Between The Lines

Sunday Mindset for the Week Ahead: Are You Feeling The Love?

The Tribe Has Spoken
August 11, 2024

“The emotions of man are stirred more quickly than man’s intelligence.”

- Oscar Wilde

Happy Sunday and welcome to Between the Lines. I’m rebranding our title but the message is still the same. Leadership lessons are life lessons. And it’s in the lines we speak and the fine lines between life & death, triumph & tragedy, and peace & persecution of our life that we as the main characters find these lessons. As a coach, what happens between the lines is also a leadership laboratory. I’ve lived through these many times in my story and in doing so have gained a unique perspective on how leadership exists. Just as you stop to feel a cool breeze or the sun shining on your face,leadership lessons are all around us. You just have to pay attention close enough and stop to soak it in. From tests come testimonies and tragedy changes you. It adds a lens to your life perspective. It, along with another day to live, are gifts from God. And each week that’s what I’d like to offer you. A different view on the normal around you, on life, and on leadership. Need main character energy in your life? Then as my college rugby coach so lovingly used to say, “Get on the line.”

Feeling the love!

When’s the last time you attended a wedding? And not one in which everyone is whispering about how long the couple will last either. I mean the kind when the couple stares at each other, you can literally feel how in love they are. When they read their vows, everyone’s throat begins to swell. It has a different vibe. It has an aura that feels so heavy, yet so welcoming at the same time. The venue seems to fade into the background and the real beauty of the environment and moment can be felt and appreciated. Everyone is smiling, couples hold hands, and the music sounds sweeter. The congregation hangs on the words of the groom and bride as couples reminisce of their own big day. The reception is full of hugging, back rubbing, hand shaking, and smiling. And after the DJ takes over, there’s a 1000% chance that everyone will do the cupid shuffle. You can FEEL the love. The same can be said on the opposite side of the spectrum, funerals. Without killing the vibe *no pun intended, I won’t even go into that description.

Your attitude, emotions, and energy are most definitely contagious

In the same way, your energy is contagious. No, I mean like literally. Though several authors have mentioned this anomaly in their leadership writings, I feel the urge to remind myself and others of this fact and of how it not only affects the here and now, but can also create a “forecast” for days ahead. Studies conducted by The Heart Math Institute have measured these effects. Further work has been done to measure these effects on your physical & mental health!

Your positivity or negativity doesn’t just affect you, it affects those around you. They can feel it and it affects their emotional and mental states which can subsequently affect them physically, as well as their actions. As coaches we see this all the time. Players that love their teammates and coaches will give more of their time, energy, and effort.

Do you project a cold front? Or are you the sunshine people need in their lives?

Spoiler: You will fail at this from time to time and already have at some point. No worries it’s repairable. You can start today in fact. Here are some simple tips for creating a spring-like forecast for yourself and others this week.

Flip the script on bad vibes

1) Control the vibe

Do you ever see “that person” headed your way and think, “Here we go. Time to get negative.” Or are you a “Debby Downer?” You are in control of your energy exchanges. If you’re the guilty party that’s raining on everyone else’s parade, then try some acts of kindness for others. Compliment them, offer to do something for them, plan to do something positive for 2-3 people that either project negative energy or that don’t look forward to your company because of your personal rain cloud that follows you around. I’ve been guilty of this. it takes a conscious effort to change. Identify three people that need an injection of happiness this week. Set a reminder on your phone or make a plan to do something for them. Even if it’s just checking in to let them know you care and that they’re valued.

Schedule “vibe” reminders throughout your day

2) Be resilient

Nothing kills a good vibe like a busy and chaotic day. Set reminders on your phone or schedule time to breath and do something that resets your attitude. It takes seconds to reset so be intentional about this time. Tonight before bed set a reminder for each day of the coming week to take a 3-5 minute mindset break. Think of things that make you happy; your spouse, a vacation, or your kids, or just the moments that make you happy. Plug some of those into your reminders. Accept that the unexpected will happen and catch you off guard. Find the positive in the situation and cling to it.

You don’t have to be bouncing off the walls and obnoxious to generate positive energy. Just be sincere & serve others in your leadership

3) Be a superconductor

Gandi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” If your team or organization needs an attitude adjustment, then go be the catalyst. Be a superconductor of positive energy this week. Pass the positive energy along, as well as the tips for positivity reminders. From experience, it only takes one “bad apple.” Likewise, it only takes one positive person to change the narrative as well. Check in on your team, compliment their work, ask how they’re doing and how you can help. Listen to understand not to respond or complain. Conduct positive energy to everyone around you like a Tesla supercoil.

The wedding party proceeded to file into the reception hall that was beautifully decorated in white, pink, and gold. The lovely couple exchanged vows, the crowd “awwweed,” and the DJ even texted his wife he loved her. Smiles, hugs, and handshakes were exchanged. New acquaintances were made as our defensive barriers fell apart in the deluge of joy. And you could feel the happiness. It was one of the most beautiful weddings I’d ever been to. And yes, everyone poured onto the dance floor for the cupid shuffle. They couldn’t help themselves, the happiness was contagious.

Your positivity will be tested this week. Keep smiling and keep getting back on the line. Have a blessed week leaders.